Is there someone who is pushing your ‘buttons?’

As a trained facilitator in The Demartini Method© myself, I regularly consult with people who are either highly infatuated with, or resentful towards, another person.

Either extreme form of emotions is not good for an individual as, these extreme feelings will eventually have an impact on the persons thoughts; actions and daily interactions with other people. The Demartini Method© is a tool that can assist individuals overcome such extreme forms of emotions.

[N1]Before one begins the process of The Demartini Method©, you first must determine on whom you are going to do the process. In order to receive the greatest impact and most powerful transformation, it is important to choose the person who has pushed, is pushing or could push your emotionally charged ‘buttons’ – those triggering feelings of attractive-infatuation or repulsive-resentment.

[N1] Some questions to ask yourself that will assist you in determining on whom to do The Demartini Method© include:

  1. Who do you perceive is running your life or burdening you the most?
  2. Who do you perceive is pushing your buttons the most?
  3. Who do you perceive you would least like to be around?
  4. Who do you resent or despise the most?
  5. Who do you infatuate with, admire, or attract to the most?
  6. Who do you feel ‘incomplete’ with?
  7. Who do you perceive as ‘hurting’ or ‘hooking’ you?
  8. Who do you feel left, abandoned, or dumped you?
  9. Who are you having difficulty loving and would love to love more?
  10. Who do you desire to feel more love for?


Think of the one person you are most emotionally charged about and write his or her name on a piece of paper.

[N1] How do you narrow down or prioritise the emotional charges or buttons?

List as many of the specific traits, actions or inactions that you can think of that you admire and despise about your selected person and list these on a piece of paper. Be specific and list each of them in the form of only 1-3 words descriptions.

“Most Admired Traits” “Most Despised Traits”
1 9 1 9
2 10 2 10
3 11 3 11
4 12 4 12
5 13 5 13
6 14 6 14
7 15 7 15
8 16 8 16


Note that your list of “Most Admired Traits” and “Most Despised Traits” can exceed 16 – be aware of listing synonyms – words describing the same trait.

Once done, add the total number of admired and despised traits, actions and inactions and determine the overall ratio, i.e.

16 admired and 4 despised (16/4) = 4:1 ratio

5 admired and 15 despised (5/15)= 1:3 ratio

[N1] If the resulting ratio is greater than 1:7 or 7:1, then completing The Demartini Method© process, will probably become more challenging. This is because your intuition has become subdued and your emotions are most likely blind from being aware of the opposing and balancing perspective. Such an imbalanced and blinding perspective can result in or initiate cyclothymic emotional mood swings and cycles when interacting with or consciously or unconsciously thinking about this person.

[N1]By completing The Demartini Method© you can moderate or govern such perceptual imbalances and temper any resultant emotional mood swings and regain governance over your life.

To book for a Demartini Method© consultation, email:

Regards, Dineshrie Pillay



N1: The Demartini Method Training Program© 1989…2009 Property of the Demartini Institute.

Leave a reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *